Home » Men Pelvic floor issues » Men and Sex with a Tense or Weak Pelvic Floor
Yes, you can still have sex if you’re dealing with a tense or weak pelvic floor. But it’s true—these issues can cause sexual complications. For many men, a weak pelvic floor makes it difficult to maintain an erection. On the other hand, a pelvic floor that’s too tight or overactive can prevent a full erection from happening in the first place.
The pelvic floor muscles play a vital role in sexual function—not just for women, but for men too. If these muscles are out of balance, they can lead to a wide range of pelvic and sexual problems that affect your quality of life and intimate relationships.
👉 Want to take action? Try my pelvic floor exercises or browse helpful products in the Pelvic Store.
The Link Between an Imbalanced Pelvic Floor and Sexual Issues
When your pelvic floor is either too tense or too weak, it can result in a variety of pelvic health issues. You can explore more about a weak pelvic floor here, or dive into my article on tense pelvic floor muscles.
In this blog, we’ll focus on what an overactive or weak pelvic floor means for your sex life—especially for men.
Men and a Tense Pelvic Floor
An overactive pelvic floor means the muscles are constantly tight, often without you realizing it. These muscles are responsible for subconsciously closing off the urethra and anus—but when they’re too active, you lose control over them.
This muscle tension can cause:
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- Persistent pain in the lower back, abdomen, or groin
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- Urinary issues like urge incontinence or frequent infections
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- Constipation or incomplete bowel movements
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- Overflow incontinence when the bladder or bowel becomes too full
These physical effects are tough on their own—but they can also lead to frustrating sexual consequences.
Sexual Issues from a Tense Pelvic Floor
An overactive pelvic floor can cause several well-known sexual issues. Below are the 9 most common problems, categorized for both men and women (since many of these apply across genders).
🔹 For Men:
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- Prostatitis – inflammation in the prostate
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- Pain in the testicles, penis, or groin
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- Difficulty getting or maintaining an erection
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- Premature ejaculation
🔹 For Women:
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- Vaginal dryness
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- Vaginismus or vulvitis
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- Tightness or narrowing of the vaginal canal
🔹 For Both:
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- Pain during intercourse
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- Constipation or bladder dysfunction
Pelvic floor muscles are deeply involved in erection, ejaculation, and overall sexual enjoyment. If the muscles are too tense, blood flow to the erectile tissues may be restricted. That makes it harder to achieve or maintain an erection. And while pelvic floor health is important, general health also plays a role—conditions like high cholesterol, diabetes, and side effects from certain medications can all impact sexual performance.
The Mental Side: Pelvic Tension and Performance Pressure
Let’s not forget the psychological aspect. A relaxed, confident mind is just as important as a well-functioning body during intimacy. If you’re stressed, tired, anxious, or afraid of “failing,” your pelvic floor may tense up even more. That tension can then lead to:
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- Premature ejaculation
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- Difficulty staying aroused
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- Pain during or after sex
Trying to “control” or delay orgasm with mental pressure often backfires. The more stress and tightness you feel—mentally and physically—the more difficult it becomes to stay in control.
Learning to relax and regulate your pelvic floor muscles is essential. Knowing when to tighten and when to release is the foundation of a healthy, enjoyable sex life.
What Can You Do?
You don’t have to live with these issues. Whether your pelvic floor is overactive, weak, or a mix of both, there are steps you can take to regain control, reduce discomfort, and restore confidence in your sex life.
✔️ Start with guided pelvic floor exercises
✔️ Explore relaxing techniques for the pelvic area
✔️ Read more about male pelvic health in my other blog posts
✔️ Browse helpful tools in the Pelvic Store
Your sex life doesn’t have to be on hold
With the right approach, you can restore balance, reduce tension, and enjoy intimacy again—without pain, pressure, or stress.
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Sex Advice for Men with a Tense or Weak Pelvic Floor
When your pelvic floor isn’t functioning properly, your sex life can be seriously affected. Whether your pelvic floor is too tight (overactive) or too weak, it influences everything from getting and maintaining an erection to feeling confident during intimacy. The good news? You can take back control—with the right knowledge and approach.
4 Sex Tips for Men with a Tense Pelvic Floor
If you have a tense or overactive pelvic floor, your muscles are constantly in a state of tightness. This makes it hard for blood to flow freely to the penis, often leading to erection issues or premature ejaculation. But with the right techniques, you can reduce this tension and enjoy sex again.
✅ Tip 1: Learn to Relax Your Pelvic Floor
Relaxation is absolutely key when dealing with a tense pelvic floor. A tight pelvic floor restricts blood flow to the erectile tissues, making it difficult to get or keep an erection. Start by practicing scientifically backed relaxation exercises for the pelvic floor. Don’t worry—they’re not spiritual or vague, just clear, evidence-based techniques to help your body unwind.
Need help? Check out the pelvic floor relaxation exercises I’ve put together.
✅ Tip 2: Relax Together
Sex is a shared experience, and communication with your partner is essential. Talk openly about what you’re going through and explore ways to relax together. Try giving each other a gentle massage, take the pressure off performance, and allow intimacy to evolve slowly. Start with closeness—without expectations.
✅ Tip 3: Set the Right Mood
Creating the right atmosphere can work wonders. Warm up the room, dim the lights, light a few candles, and play some soothing music. Even better: do some pelvic relaxation exercises together before getting intimate. You’ll both feel more at ease, and your pelvic floor will too.
✅ Tip 4: Trauma? Get Extra Support
Sometimes, a tense pelvic floor is rooted in past experiences like sexual trauma. If that’s the case, pelvic floor exercises alone may not be enough. Consider combining them with guidance from a sexologist or psychologist. This approach helps address both the physical and emotional components of pelvic tension.
What If Your Pelvic Floor Is Weak Instead?
A weak pelvic floor in men is less common but can still cause real issues. It often develops after surgery on the prostate or bladder, and occasionally due to aging or prolonged inactivity.
Common symptoms of a weak pelvic floor:
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- Involuntary leakage of urine or stools (incontinence)
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- Trouble holding back gas or bowel movements
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- Signs of pelvic organ prolapse
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- Reduced sensation or control during sex
Even though the symptoms differ, both tight and weak pelvic floor muscles interfere with sexual confidence and performance.
Ready to Strengthen or Relax?
Knowing whether your pelvic floor is too tight or too weak is the first step. Once you know that, you can start working with targeted exercises and techniques to either relax or strengthen the muscles.
You deserve a sex life that feels good—physically and emotionally.
Let your body (and mind) work with you, not against you.
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Sexual Issues and a Weak or Tense Pelvic Floor in Men
Pelvic floor problems can have a major impact on your sex life. Whether your pelvic floor is overactive (too tense) or underactive (too weak), it can lead to various complications—physicaly, emotionally, and in the bedroom. The good news? There are effective strategies to improve your sexual health.
In this article, we’ll cover the most common sexual issues in men caused by pelvic floor dysfunction, and offer practical sex tips for managing both weak and tense pelvic floor muscles.
The 4 Most Common Sexual Issues with a Weak Pelvic Floor
When your pelvic floor muscles are weakened—often due to surgery (such as prostate removal), aging, or inactivity—it affects your control over both bodily functions and sexual performance. Below are the four most frequent issues in men (plus one for women):
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- Urinary or fecal incontinence
A weak pelvic floor reduces control over your bladder and bowels. You may even struggle to hold in gas.
- Urinary or fecal incontinence
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- Reduced libido
Many men (and women) with pelvic floor issues feel less desire for sex. This could be due to physical discomfort or emotional concerns like fear of failure or embarrassment.
- Reduced libido
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- Difficulty maintaining an erection
A weak pelvic floor may fail to hold blood within the erectile tissues, causing erections to weaken or fade too quickly.
- Difficulty maintaining an erection
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- Erectile dysfunction
When blood can’t stay in the penis, a full erection becomes difficult to achieve. Over time, this can also cause performance anxiety or low self-esteem.
- Erectile dysfunction
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- (Women only): Reduced sensation during penetration, often due to underactive pelvic floor muscles.
5 Sex Tips for Men with a Weak Pelvic Floor
If you’re dealing with a weakened pelvic floor, don’t worry—there’s a lot you can do to rebuild strength and improve sexual function.
✅ Tip 1: Strengthen the Pelvic Floor
Pelvic floor exercises (also known as Kegels) are essential if your muscles are too weak. Especially after prostate or bladder surgery, these exercises help restore strength and control. Try my evidence-based pelvic floor exercises to get started.
✅ Tip 2: Practice With Your Partner
Strengthening your pelvic floor doesn’t have to be a solo mission. Get your partner involved. Practice together in a lighthearted, pressure-free way. This builds connection, reduces anxiety, and turns recovery into teamwork.
✅ Tip 3: Train in a Calm Environment
Give your pelvic floor training your full attention. Find a quiet space, put on calming music, and approach your routine without stress or distractions. Healing takes time—don’t rush.
✅ Tip 4: Consider Surgery (as a Last Resort)
If strengthening doesn’t bring the desired results, there are surgical options. Some procedures involve implants that help create an erection. However, this is usually a last option, and should only be considered after you’ve explored natural recovery through pelvic floor strengthening. Always discuss this with your doctor.
What If Your Pelvic Floor Is Too Tight?
Just like weakness, tension can also interfere with sexual function. An overactive pelvic floor can:
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- Restrict blood flow to the penis
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- Cause pain in the groin, testicles, or perineum
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- Lead to premature ejaculation
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- Cause urinary urgency or pelvic discomfort
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- Create feelings of frustration or shame during intimacy
If tension is the issue, relaxation exercises are key. These are simple, science-based techniques that help your pelvic floor let go of chronic tightness.
What Should You Do?
Many men feel pressure to always perform—but when something isn’t working, the best step is to find the root of the problem. Whether it’s tension, weakness, trauma, or something else, there is a solution.
🧠 Don’t compare yourself to your 20-year-old self. Bodies change with time, and your sex life does too. What matters is adjusting with care and confidence.
💬 Talk to a professional. If you’re unsure whether your pelvic floor is weak or tense—or if you’re dealing with psychological or physical trauma—consult a healthcare provider. They may refer you to a:
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- Pelvic physiotherapist
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- Pelvic health specialist
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- Sexologist
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- Psychologist or psychiatrist
You’re not alone in this, and there’s zero shame in seeking help. With expert support and a personalized treatment plan, you can move toward recovery—physically, emotionally, and sexually.
Still Looking for More Information?
I hope this article helped clarify things for you. Want to go deeper? The website is full of helpful articles, practical tips, pelvic health exercises, and even a Pelvic Store with tools to support your journey.
🔹 Read more about pelvic floor tension
🔹 Explore male pelvic health exercises
🔹 Visit the web shop
Your sexual health matters—and there’s a path forward
Take the first step today, and start working toward confidence, control, and pleasure again.